Mental Covers: Captain Heidi.

Fighting crime is a tough job. Not so much when you have super powers, but when crime also has super powers, things can get painful. So what happens when you run out of stories and your superhero needs a break? Invent a new power that lets him give them to his girlfriend of course.

Back when I was planning out the original series, Mental's powers were in his mask. If he took it off, he'd lose them and revert to his old personality, and stop breathing. Nowadays he's got his own super powers, and the mask is pretty much grafted to his face. Back then his powers also included reality manipulation because he was a rip-off of The Mask, I have cured this, though he can still grab weapons from nowhere due to his TARDIS-like hoodie. In this case Mental gave most of his powers, and she goes nuts with them and they eventually break up over it. Looking back, this wasn't a very good idea.

I KILL GIANTS: Fallout 3 cont.

I had previously said that in Fallout 3, 'After killing something you feel like you can take on anything. Unfortunatley anything usually shwos up shortly afterwards and makes you it's virtual bitch.' I have recently found that these words are actually somewhat harsh, since as of yesturday I have claimed the lives of about ten Super Mutants. When I said you feel like you can take on anything, I was referring to groups of Raiders, some mole rats, or a Mirelurk. Killing a Super Mutant made me feel as if I could literally punch out Cthulhu.

By what I remember, I was wandering a city when I was attacked by a Raider and his robot. After dispatching the Raider, I hauled ass as I don't think I'd be very good against a non-living opponent. I was running when I used VATS to make sure his friends weren't nearby. What I found instead was an angry Super Mutant charging at me. This was definately an 'Oh Crap' moment, but I decided I'd die fighting again. However, this time I was carrying more than my usual Pea-Shooter, and was very surprised when the Super Mutant eventually fell to the ground as a corpse instead of me. I was very pleased with myself, and it was all I could do to then empty a few rounds into his buddy, who DID have a gun. I was very irritated to then get slaughtered by Talon Mercenaries. I've decided they are a much bigger problem than Super Mutants because there is a lot of them.

I also have to say that the satisfaction you get from Head-Shots in this game is very high, so seeing your bullets knock a Super Mutants head clean off, or reduc it to a stain on the floor is an awesome experience. What makes it even better is when they have captives. I have rescued two Super Mutant captives, and both times I felt like I had genuinlet helped. And hell, I killed a Super Mutant to do it, that is hard core.

The second event was much cooler though. I had read about the AntAgonizer, a woman who beleives she is a super villain, and that you could actually access Hubris Comics ('her' publisher). Once I found it I decided that instead of just wallowing about terrified as I usually did, I'd just go in and introduce all hostiles to my Boomsticks. I ran into some Feral Ghouls, who are essentially the games version of zombies, and blasting their heads off with a shotgun is nowhere less satisfying as doing it to the regular brand. After briefly getting over powered, I started looking around. I found the comics company but it wasn't that exciting. I decided I wanted to leave when I took a wrong turn and ended up in a courtyard of sorts. After looking for a minute, I realised there was a man tied up in the centre. And he was being guarded by Super Mutants. About eight Super Mutants. Needless to say, many bricks were shat.
Nontheless, I decied to help out anyway. After irritated one with a hunting Rifle for a bit, I had their attention. They climbed the stairs towards me, but I gave them Frag Grenades. I then used my new Combat Shotgun, but eventually found myself dead. Two Super Mutants were still standing. I was very impressed with myself. After another failed attempt, I was very happy to report that the captive was now a free man. This success was mainly thanks to me stealing a Super Dead Mutant's mini-gun once I was low on bullets.

I later decided to deliberatley find Super Muties to try out my new Minigun on, but found that it eats up its ammo rather quickly. Works a charm of Centaurs, though.

Let's Talk Fallout 3

Yes, this will probably become a recurring segment, just a heads up.
This isn't so much a review, but just my experience with the game, but it will contain some review elements for a better understanding.

I'm a gamer, so I'm always eager to play something new and invariably awesome. I didn't really get in on looking for what was upcoming, nor did I even own my third generation console (PS3, yes I know) until like two or trhee years ago, so Elder Scrolls Oblivion slid past my radar completley, and I had no interest in it because by what I could tell it was just another RPG thing. I finally picked it up at the Video Store and was delighted to find that I was completley wrong. It was actually an extremley well done RPG that even I could enjoy. It had plenty for me to enjoy, even if I did get curb stomped at every encounter. Admittedly I was quite bad at it and could barely figure out where I was going, and I usually ran away when ever confronted by something that shoots magics at me. I did once take down a band of bandits though, so that was pretty cool. I stole their stuff and my mum told me I was a terrible person. I was horribly frustrated so I took my anger out on more bandits.

So anyway, I eventually discovered Resistance: Fall of Man. This game has arguably gotten me into FPS games, so I was in the mood for them. I mistakenly picked up Fallout 3, believing it to be one of these. I was quite shocked to discover that the game could be summed up as 'Oblivion with Guns,' and let me tell you, if Oblivion did have guns I wouldn't have died as much.

The game is set after the Nuclear Apocolypse of this alternate Earth. As Hellboy explains it, the world built these special shelters known as 'Vaults' where people could live out the life threatening radiation. Once the radiation wore down, everyone was on their merry way rebuilding society. However, that wasn't the case for Vault 101, which stayed locked. That's where our story begins. Your mother dies just after childbirth leaving your father to take care of you. I should mention here that your father is also King of Olympus and God of Lighting:


After learning the basics, you advance in time until your about 19, and your father takes his hoard of Lightning Bolts and hauls ass into the Wasteland for some reason. You run after him and end up in the emersive world of Fallout 3.

First of all I 'd like to point out the Karma System. In order to help yourself on your way towards being a mass murdering monster in the Wasteland you can gain Bad Karma in the tutorial. Unfortunatley your choices include telling your friends that the birthday party that they arranged for you sucks, suggesting ways to bullies as to how they can be mean to your friend, and basically being an ungrateful bastard. Now I may have massacred people by the truckload in Grand Theft Auto 4, but I feel that's just a bit harsh. I nfact I wanted to take the part of an Evil Overlord, minus the army, but I found it much too hard to slaughter anyone who didn't start the fight in the first place. I don't know whether to be irritated or happy that the designers put that much work into everything.

This game is also somewhat depressing for me. Whenever I play it I feel somewhat upset for reasons I don't understand. I don't start sobbing, I just feel like something is wrong with my soul. This is probably because while Oblivion had a lush landscape full of friendly faces and whimsical wonders, Fallout 3 gives us horrible mutations and is generally not set in a very nice place. For example, one mission I keep accidentally entering has a young boy tell me that his settlememt has been attacked by giant fire breathing ants. I decided to help him, but found myself dying a fair few times by the ants jaws and eventually I realised I had no idea what to do after killing half of them. When I finally did, I had run out of ammunition. I decided I wanted to do something else with my time, but leaving the kid after telling him made me feel like a Grade-A douchebag, so I continued to die a lot trying to help.

But the game isn't bad by any stretch of the word. In fact, it'ss probably not because the game is hard, but because I'm not very good. This just sweetens all your victories. For example, just yesturday I was playing it and was ridding a the Super-Duper Mart of Raiders. I was a bit worried at first but then I introduced them to by Sawn-Off Shotgun and I was home free. Then I sold all the crap I stole from them and went along with the storyline.
On the way I encountered some more Raiders, but once they realised I had a gun, they ran screaming. I took their stuff too. Then I was confronted by this walking crab-beast called a Mirelurk. I decided that if a small army with guns didn't take me down, I wasn't going to let ONE crab thing do it either, so I emptied a few round from my Hunting Rifle into it's face, and just because I could, ate some of it's flesh. I tell you, once you've killed anything remotley dangerous in this game, you'll feel like you can take on anything. Unfortunatley, Anything usually shows up a few minutes later and makes you it's digital bitch.
I of course refer to a moment shortly after the Mirelurk encounter inwhich I met two more Raiders. They had much bigger guns than me, so I hid behind a car while they wasted their ammo, but they eventually wised up and ran over to me. I then made use of the games targetting system (VATS) and began making it a fair fight. This wouldn've gone better, but another one decided to show up, and they killed me as I was loading.

It's also wise to be careful what you wish for. I wanted to encounter a bigger monster so that I could feel awesome for emptying my gun into it. I got my wish in the form of a Super Mutant. That was all well and good, but what I didn't realise is that it's friend was with him. Not only that but someone had built armour in his size, and even more bizare, someone had given him a very large gun. I was surprised to find that if not for the gun, I may have actually stood a chance as my bullets were affecting them much more than I'd have expected, but they were still owning me, so I ran off a bridge. They found me, so I realised I was going to die. Well you know what they say, "Some may never live, but the crazy never die." I then proceeded to pull out my baseball bat and pound him on the face wit hit. Needless to say this turned out to be surprisingly effective, and the Super Mutant seemed very confused by my change of tactic. Unfortunatley it wasn't long before my organs were replaced with hundreds of lead pellets and I was missing an arm. But I bet they'll be talking about this at the water cooler.

That also reminds me of an event inwhich I was being attacked by a pair of Raiders. This was probably my second time playing the game, so I wasn't really used to it. Forunatley I was saved by the intervention of a hungry Mole Rat (which is roughly the size of a large dog). The Mole rat began combating the Raider and with my half of the battle already done, won, leaving me to just put a few bullets in the mangy creature. I really liked the idea of seeing these fights, so when I saw a 'Centaur' and a Mirelurk in the same area, I deliberatley got their attention. Unfortunatley the situation ended with me running from both of them Scooby-Doo style, and then a Super Mutant showed up.

Also it might be good to mention something else that makes the game somewhat emotionally difficult. I came across some people standing around a fridge. My scanners revealed they were escaped slaves. That sounded good, someone for me to talk to, because being in a Desert Wasteland full of things that want me dead can be rather stressfull. They then tell me that they found the purified water, and are not planning on sharing it. I had the option to try and haggle for it, but I wasn't really interested so I told them I'd leave. Instantly upon doing so, they opened fire on each other. I was a bit shocked, having them picked as a team. Confused, I eventually joined the fray and came out victorious. I decided to go about my usual business, looking them, take the water, but then I noticed someone else was there, someone I didn't recognise. If I had to guess, this was someone else who also wanted the water, and tried to take it during the fight, and ended up dead instead. In an act of grief I spared her from my looting, but I took the water. This was done mainly because it restores a buttload of health, but also because I previously met a man who was dying of dehydration. I gave him a bottle and recieved some delicious good karma, so at least things went well in the end.

I also feel that part of the reason for my feelings is that I may be killing things and getting Good Karma, but since I'm so bad at this, I have and probably never will really become the hardened badass the game can mold you into. Perhaps its my inability to enter buildings due to being somewhat of a coward and havinh a slight aversion to dying. I also briefly felt like going on a rampage in Megaton. I could bring myself to it, really. I have a particuler fondness for Gob the Ghoul. I think one of my goals if I ever do get 'good' at this game will be to go back and shoot Moriarty.

Above all, while the game is somewhat more emmersive than Oblivion, you'll find Oblivion to be the one you'd much rather live in. I know that's obvious, but even with overlapping awesome, this game is not for the faint of heart. I haven't even got to the High Octane Nightmare Fuel.

Crowning Moment of Awesome.

I know I've used it before, but...this picture. Just this picture.

Mortal Kombat 'Trailer.'

I'm a fanof Mortal Kombat. I haven't really played it that much, but I like the charcters, and what I have played was addictive. It's just there's like one MK game for the PS3. While I enjoyed the first movie (I know the second one is bad, but plan on seeing it anyway) I've gotta say this new one looks a bit odd.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hy2CGY4c55k

By odd I of course mean awesome, but by what I can tell from that short film and my sources, the finished film will omit any supernatural elements. The wy the film does it makes it look feasible but I just have to ask...how? How can you do that? That's like making a film about Superman and having him be in the costume, but instead of having super powers he's just a body builder with a jetpack. The villain is a wizard, one dude is a god in human form, and one guy is a half dragon prince with four fudging arms! Admittedly there are multiple badass normals throughout the series, but you cannot just throw away something that big. And I know he's much more popular, and heck I like him much more, but I'm pretty sure Liu Kang is supposed to the be the good guy, not Scorpion.
All in all, I have to say that if the film is made, I'd probably see it.

One more thing, I know theres a crimewave, but isn't it a bit much to have the police ordering killings? I mean yeah, that's the plan and they probably all deserve it, but dude, your a Policeman. And your supposed to have robot hands, another reason why we require the supernatural.

Haiku Review: Savage Dragon.

Green Fin Headed Man.
He dies an awful lot.
Story confuses me.

This Months Haul.

Today I thought I'd talk about the hoard of comics I bought yesturday. This probably won't take too long, but meh I thought I'd share some feelings. I can't be bothered putting up the covers, so heres a random picture. I'll mainly be talking about stuff that bothers me, but on a whole I'd say that this was a good month.



Deadpool.
Deadpool is still very much awesome as usual. The storyline at the moment of the main series is pretty good, and longtime Butt Monkey Weasel gets a Crowning Moment of Awesome. Unfortunatley this storyline has somewhat confused me in regards to Deadpool's current motivation. The last eight or so issues focussed on him deciding to help people, and now he's turned into a jerkass again. It is awesome, so I won't actually hold it against the series.
Merc with a Mouth has also been pretty good, but the zombie universe is getting a bit boring. Well maybe boring isn't the right word, but I'm not a fan of Marvel Zombies, and while I am definatley a fan of Headpool I guess I prefer my zombies Angry Mob style.
Finally, I like how Deadpool's been growing in popularity, but I have to say that I'm almost experiencing the same problem that we get with Superman and Batman. DP has yet another miniseries going on, which makes like what? Six series? And I'm buying all of them! They're good, but if I hadn't been in from the early days, I'd be lost as all hell!

Gotham City Sirens.
This is everything you'd want from a series staring Catwoman, Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy. It's technically not a Villain Protagonist story, but more of a...Reformed but not friendly Villain Protagonist story. Okay, basically they're villains, but they don't do evil things any more,but neither do they activley fight crime.
This is going to put me in a very small minority but Ivy is really starting to bug me. She uses her seduction powers to get a high class job at S.T.A.R. Labs, then fires half the staff to show she means business. An employee tries to take revenge upon discovering her identity, but it dosn't quite work and now Ivy is working on threatening her for some purpose. This is the sort of thing I'd expect from the villainous side of a comic, which makes perfect sense, but I just want to punch her! Which would then get me killed, so it's a lose-lose situation!
And also, for some of The Goddamned Batman's greatest enemies, they sure get their asses kicked a lot. A while back they get their asses handed to them by a midget clown disguised as the Joker, they were just over equally matched by an old man with a walking stick, and in this issue they get the snot beaten out of them by Catwoman's Batshit crazy nun sister.
Also, it's not portrayed as such, but robbing a Church is what I'd use for a Kick the Dog moment Ms. Kyle.
Harley's doing fine though.

Savage Dragon.
This month's release is nowhere near as depressing as last months. It's pretty clever, especially how Larsen subverts the Big Bad status of Overlord. He's insanley powerful and actually managed to finally kill off the hero for good, but he's not really doing too well with the evil scheming and stuff. He also feels terrible about sending the mooks to their deaths in the previous issue. Larsen continues to make this a turning point by killing OpenFace, one of Dragon's more memorable villains, and a guy whose been with us since pretty much the start. At least he died trying todo something awesome. But I already said I'd be discussing the negatives, so here we go.
There's a major squick factor in the suggestion that Angel should hook up with her brother Malcolm. Granted, Angel recognises the squick and has no interest, and her dumb friends are he ones who suggested it, and it is pointed out that they aren't blood related, but good god this is Chicago, not a stereotypical Redneck town.
Speaking of Malcolm, good god when did he start taking steroids? I understand that it's Larsen's intention to have him take up the mantle of Savage Dragon, but I think he should have remained sort of lanky. I mean...dude! That does not look natural. I swear a few issues ago he actually looked like he was 13. If I saw him I'd assume his early twenties!

Invincible.
I bough the Invincible One-Shot 'Invincible Returns,' which is actually the real issue 71, but it's longr, while Issue 71 is technically issue 72, but lets not enter a loop here.
Okay, I don't actually have any complaints about this issue. Well, that's a lie actually. There's a few odd bits of dialogue, but that's more likley my opinion, I mean they have to get their exposition from somewhere, right? Next up is that it's shaking up the status quo so much. We're going to be spending like six or so issues in the Viltrumite War, which is set in space. I'm sure it'll be good, but I was liking what we had on Earth. Besides, I know it's been about ten months, but we're still recovering from the Invincible War. And finally Invincible switches back to his classic yellow costume. Man, I liked your blue costume! It kicked ass! This one makes your head look long. There's an instory explanation that I find hard to disagree with. Invincible recently stepped over the Moral Event Horizon by killing an innocent man possessed by the aliens known as Sequids. He's decided to not kill any more full stop, and switched to his old costume because blue one reminded him of the incident and made him feel disgusted with himself.
All on all, I'd say it was an excellent jumping point for new readers.

Booster Gold.
I stopped buying Booster for a while because I thought the series ended. As it turns out, I was wrong, so I started up again. You can't blame me, the current storyline concluded, it had a somewhat finalistic tone and it was issue 30, which would be a good number to end on. Anyway, complaints...during a fight with Skull Agents, Booster reflects a laser blast and kills a little girls dog. It leads to a Crowning Moment of Heartwarming at the end, but the way they react to it. You killed a dog. Not the Little Girl, the dog. You didn't mean to. The Dog didn't explode into a gory mess. And you have a Heroic BSOD about it, and they start hurling abuse at him. Seriously? There were evil super villains running around causing havoc, putting hundreds of people in danger, and you start telling the hero he's compleley worthless because of something like that? He stopped all the Agents, I mean come on! Yes, you should be upset, but you need to get your priorities straight!

I also bought five issues of Amazing Spider-Man (and I'm still behind). I'm going to read one weekly until my next comic Store Trip, so I haven't read them yet. However,I hear that they are awesome. Nevertheless, Deviling away twenty years of continuity cannot be patched up one very awesome storyline.

Villain Spotlight: Serleena

The Kylothean agent known as Serleena has spent her life in pursuit of The Light of Zartha, with which her race can finaly conquer the world of Zartha. Throughout her travels she has inspected, and subsequently destroyed many planets in an attempt to find the Light, eventually following its guardians to Earth. However, a confrontation with the Men In Black allowed the Zarthans to escape, an forced Serleena to continue her pursuit for a number of decades. However, a message from an informent known as Charlie and Scrad (a two headed creature) gave credence to the theory that the Light was still on Earth.

Okay, befor I continue talking about her actual character, I enjoy Serleena as a villain, but I will admit that she isn't the best one, especially when compared to Edgarbug of the first movie. First of all, Director Barry Sonnenfeld outright states on the DVD that they wanted a female villain to attract male audiences. I didn't see it in theaters, but if the fact that it was Men in Black II didn't get me into it, she probably would've. Second her acting isn't the best either. While most of the time she is pretty calm ad calculating, at certain points, such as her belittling of Kay as she beats him, come off as a good dose of Narm.
Last of all, her plan to take over MIBHQ is essentially:

1. Walk in.

2.???

3.Take over.

The annoying bit is that it works. She just walks into our last and only line of defence against the worst scum of the universe, has her sidekick fake a heart attack and shoots her tentacles everywhere. And we know from later occurences that all it would take is a few damn lasers and she'd be down. I like the movie but I find this part particulerly glaring.

Anywho...great, now I've lost my train of thought. Um...She shapeshifts, she eats people as both her monster form and human form (which is a CMOF for sheer unexpectedness), and is pretty hot considering she is a tentacle monster. Not really much to say other than that.

Sideburns Speculates: Batman in Marvel.

Welcome to yet another new segment. But good news, this one has to do with comics, and won't make sense to anyone unfamiliar with them. Today we speculate Batman in the universe of Marvel.

As stupid as my ignorant peers are, their stupidity isn't enough to make Batman an occupant of the Marvel Universe. Not that he hasn't seen it, there has been a number of crossovers throughout time, but he does not live there.

But lets say he was aware of it's existance. It is indeed a Crapsack World, and Batman cannot let that pass. Admittedly he cannot bring world peace or cure disease or World Hunger, but he will not let crime go unpunished. So, lets imagine that he gained a 'window' of sorts to the Marvel Universe. He discovers the horrible crimes commited by many and decides he must help. He upgrades the window to send him to the universe. The process is not perfect and changes him completley, granting him an actual set of abilities and numerous changes to his body. Being Batman, he does not mind and has his mind on the goal of crime fighting. The process between worlds is long, so he has plenty of time to study the villainous figures he has seen in the window. Being aware of the intelligence on the other side, he plans to use he changes to his body to disguise himself so that they will not only beunable to recognise him in the event that they have a time, window, but never even suspect it. Once on the other side he sets into his plans into motion after crafting his new persona:

Mental Covers: Love Shape.

For the super powered, love is rarley easy, something Mental and Heidi don't experience a lot since she more often than not helps him out. But occasionally something comes up. For example, here we have him being smothered by an ooze girl. But she's not alone. There's also a plant girl in tow, a fairy and something eldritch in the sewer. Neither Mental nor Heidi seem to be taking this very well.

Mental originally started out sharing his spotlight with his brother Mike, who was essentially an alternate sane personality of sorts, so when I brought in Heidi I eventually cut him out of it. With that I also made their relationship somewhat lovey dovey, because at least one superhero deserves to have a good relationship. One might think it's odd to give a character based on oneself a really good relationship, but I assure you, shut up.
The premise itself stems from the childhoods of many people who have had crushes on cartoon characters, mostly weird ones. Here's that happening in real life, except reversed and with the main character in a loving relationsip.

Top 10 Missed Oppertunities of Awesome in Ghostbusters: The Game.

Who ya gonna call? GHOSTBUSTRS! Yes like anyone else who has half a mind and has seen it, I love Ghostbusters. It showed taught us about paranormal activities, showed us the brilliance of it's writers, and taught us that Evil Marshmellow's are cool. I even like the second film which is widley considered inferior but only because it rehashed all the original plot points but was otherwie an alright film, but admittedly such a thing does entail a lot of problems and DAMN I just wrote a lot.

Anywho, likemany other people, I was excited by the announcement of a Ghostbusters game, featuring three quarters of the original cast. However, it seemed like the sort of thing that would be stuck in developement forever. Fortunatley it turns out I'm just impatient an lo and behold we were given Ghostbusters the Video Game, and it kicked ass. Unfortunatley it wasn't perfect, but this isn't actualy a review so I won't discuss the bad things. Instead I'll tell you what could have been. While playing through the game again, I noticed that there were a lot of oppertunities that weren't taken, and I realsed that the game has probably more than any I can really think of. So, here we have my Top Ten Missed Oppertunities of Awesome in Ghistbusters the Game.
Oh, and just to mention, these may not be in any rea order unti towards the end, I'm not too good with that aspect.



10. Too Short.
One of the more common complaints about the game. It's annoying really. The Game is so freaking awesome that you want to keep playing, you want to hear more of the GB's chatter and you want to catch more ghosts, but before you know it, the game's over. Tragic I tell you. I suppose one could argue that they didn't want to fill the game up with padding, but you know what? I'd be fine with that? Pretty much my favorite parts of the game are when you forget that there's an ongoing plot and just go after a particulerly interestinf ghost. The best examples of which would probably be Pappy Sagrassi, Chef DeForrest, Slimer (of course) and the Civil War Ghosts. You forget your overall objective and just have fun, almostas if your just playing a game aboutdoing your job as a Ghostbuster. Well, considering how often they fight gods and go through this sort of thing, I guess you could say it is anyway.

On the note of length, I think I should bring up the Parade level which was cut from the game. My guess is that it would include a parade...and ghosts.

9. More Janine.
Where would the Ghostbusters be without Janine Melnitz? Probably out of work because you sort of need someone to keep track of things like phone calls and finance. Janine is an odd case for some. While the films gave us Sigourney Weaver, many wre more interested in the deadpan secretary played by Annie Potts. But that's ainly because she's funny. It really makes you wonder, as she's the first character in the films to not think the GB's are nuts, though it could be argued that she got the job because of her attraction to Egon. Still, they catch ghosts...but I guess it is New York, and a job is a job.
Anyway, Ms. Potts returns for the game and is kind enough to give us some hilarious dialogue. For example, "Hello, Ghostbusters, how can we help you? What? No, we do not ressurect dead family members so you can ask them the combination to the family vault. Yeah, well same to you pal." FUNNY! Mainly she sits at her desks and answers calls, but makes a few appearances in the cutscenes. Unfortunatley unlike some games, she has like one unique line per level and will just repeate stuff like, "No, that's a soon as we're open," or "I don't think so." What this game needs is more hilarious Janine dialogue and maybe some more in game appearance. In fact I'd say the most obvious idea would be to have her interview the Rookie (The Player) at the start. I cannot be the only one thinking that!

8 Containment View.
As with all other versions of the series, we see the Ghost Containment Vault, though it only really comes up like twice and even then it's not important. But one particuler note is when Slimer escapes in the first level. He apparently has been attracted to it since they installed a new view screen for them. That sounds cool, what's it look like? I don't know. I don't think they do either, cos as far as I can tell there isn't one, and it was just an excuse to have Slimer stand there and not notice you.
A shame really, I'd have liked to has seen all the ghosts I captured, and maybe even see some shout outs to The Real Ghostbusters, cos as far as I'm aware we didn't get too many of those. Then again I've only seen two episodes of that show, and I didn't finish the second one, and I only say them because they were on the DVD.

7. Stay Puft Fight.
Not really sure if this one actually counts, but I can't say the Stay Puft Level was as good as it could have been. By no means did I not enjoy i, but there were a few things that were a bit iffy, the only one of which really worth mentioning is the final fight with 'Tubby Softsqueeze.' You hang from the side of the building shooting at him as he climbs towards you, occasionally spitting marshmellow goo at you, sending angry minions at you and distracting the player by making them hungry. I think I'd have enjoyed the fight a bit more if it were all five Ghostbustrs shooting at him as we ran through the streets desperatlet trying not to be smushed. Also, he seems shorter up close.

6. Five on Five.
The game consantly gives excuses as to why the whole team can't come out and kick ass. They save that for the last level. But it ets quite grating at times, especially when you know that this whole fight would go by without a hitch if Ray would just get out of the car! This isn't too bad of a problem, but it's at its worst when they are togethor and then suddenly find some reason to leave you with just two of them.

5. Ecto-1.
While the Ecto-1 does look silly and is nowhere near as awesome as the Batmobile, like Arkham Asylum you will look at the Ghostbuster's car and be mighty pissed that you never get to take the wheel. Admittedly this would entail much other than ramming the big monsters (there's a surprising number of things you don't catch in this game), and since it's not a sandbox game you wouldn't really be able o do much anyway, but you still feel like you're missing out. On the note of the Ecto-1, what about the Super Slammer? You get to use it in one level and it never comes up agin

4. The Missing Cast.
We get a return from Walter Peck and possibly the Hotel Manager (if not the voice is pretty damn close) but you'll notice a lack of Rick Moranis and Sigourney Weaver. Well, as for Rick, he dosn' do acting any more. A while ago his wife died and he has kids, so he decided his family was more important than his acting. I think he released a comedy album. Weaver, I think she just didn't want to come bak to the role, I guess that's understandable, seeing how it would seem that theyhad a hard time keeping Bill Murray in the studio (you'll notice some of his pre recorded lines are repeated at a few points). However, this brings up the question of, what about Oscar? You know, Dana's son? Weren't you technically his father now Venkman? She seems to have been put on a bus, but they try to ignore the subject. I'd have liked it if Rick showed up, then we could've have him as a sixth GB like in the second film.

3. Ghost Invasion.
Towards the end of the game, the Containment Unit is sabotaged and the ghosts escape (AGAIN!) and the Big Bad begins growing in power due to absorbing the energy. The GB's decide to take caution in this mission because all them ghosts they captured? They're gonna be pissd. The energy emmitted is enough to make Central Park 'mutate' into a massive cemetary. This is kinda cool, and while I was overwhelmed a few times, I have to ask, where did all those ghosts go? It's sort of been suggested that Big Bad, for the lack of a better word, eats them, but what could have made a really cool level? Central park full of ghosts, five ghostbustrs, kicking ass. While not the worst Missed Oppertunity, it is the second most glaring. And unlike the movies we don't even get a montage of ghostly mayhem. The closest thing you'll get to this is the Civil War Ghost Fight, but not quite.

2. The Theme Song.
In total I'd say the song comes up three times in the entire game. One at the start, once at the end, and whenever you die. This is a gross underuse of one of histories greatest theme songs. As my friend random_fan puts it, the entire soundtrack should be replaced with the song on a constant loop. There's moments when you really know they should bring it out, but they never do? Do you want to keep the mood? I can respect that, but there's so many times you can do it, just play th damn song! Pretty much the best time would be the final boss. Or any boss for that matter. Admittedly the final boss might not be the best choice because it's kind of slow, but you just need to find the right time to start it. Open fire on those first few chords and you've got a Crowning Moment of Awesome right there.

1. Shooting Walter Peck.
Admit it, you wanted to do this SOOOOOOO bad.

Well, that's my list, and this is ThatKidWithTheSideburns, Sideburing off.

Emo Rangers.

Welcome again to Panel by Panel, the Comics Blog that seems to review everthing BUT comics. Let me tell you about the story of a struggle between good and evil. A powerful heroic being was locked in combat with an evil sorceress and her army of monsters. Eventually she was defeated, but the being was stuck in another dimension. When the evil return he was powerless to stop her, so he instead used his abilities to give his powers to five teenagers with attitude to protect us from her and evil in all its forms. Eventually the sorceress's evil evolved and there were even more like her. It has taken many generations, but finally we meet their ultimate incarnation. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you, Power Rangers: Emo Force!



Oh, my apologies, this is actually Mighty Moshin' Emo Rangers. Hey, I like Mighty Moshin' Emo Rangers, let's talk about this instead!

I am a fan of Power Rangers. I don't really go out of my way to watch it any more, but it's a big part of my childhood and I basically cry tears of nostalgia whenever I hear the song. I technically sort of lost interest after the original first season, but they kick ass, so who cares? So when I discovered Emo Rangers, I thought it was hilarius. It was. If you don't care about my opinions just visit their website http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LmVtb3JhbmdlcnMuY29t

The story is pretty basic, even compared to the real Power Rangers. The Evil Empress (really? Not even a joke on the name Rita Repulsa? Come on!) crashes onto the moon and quickly makes a point to erect a castle and destroy the closest planet, which as always, is Earth (With all the movies and signals we send out, we're really asking for it). She does this by sending out a giant robot to kill everyone. The powerful Captain Emohead (Three gueses who this guy's based on) summons five depressed teenagers to gain powers and beat up the robot. Specifically, they are Ross the White Introspective Emo Ranger, Luke the Red Chaos Mowhawk Emo Ranger, Stef the Bleeding Heart Pink Emo Ranger, John The Green Chronic Stoner Emo Ranger, Vicken the Yellow Weeping Tears Emo Ranger. And then they gain their Sixth Ranger (Fai, the Purple FashionxCore Ranger) to fight another giant robot. And a gorilla. And a bunch of people in hoodies. And Santa. That's all there really is to it.

It was simple, and the episodes were kinda done so that you had absolutley no time to remember who the characters were until they morphed, but it was pretty cool. The fight scenes were okay, and they even had CG monsters. They sold T-Shirts, and lets face it rode pretty damn well on their popularity. So, some time later when they announced that they'd be making new episodes, complete with trailers tha wreaked of Win, everyone was stoked as all hell!

Four years later, people just gave up.

The tralers were great, and the music on their MySpace by Fei Commando were awesome and featured what is probably the most kickass rendition of Jingle Bells ever. But that can only keep people going for so long. This wouldn't have been a problem, but when you promise people new episodes and they're still waiting after four years and have been repeatedly tricked with Rickrolls, they tend to get a bit annoyed. I personally didn't realise it had been four years since I discovered it in either 09 or 08, I forget, so I really haven't been as muc of a victim.

But recently there was a new development. On their blog, they commented that there would be new developments soon, because the Rickroll was dead an they had nothing better to do. That was the first of April, so everyone just complained at them. And they were right...until recently.

One of the directors (Chris) recently released a video explaining things. With all the money they made from the T-Shirts, like anyone with intelligence he invested his money. Yes, invested it in a shitload of cocaine. Well, now he's run out and needs money again. So yeah, tiding us over, right? Well, yeah they are, cos they've got a whole new site up where we can see fan art from all the fans they've been driving nuts for so long. He say they'll be up soon enough. And if he's lying, then give him props, he set up a whole website just for a laugh, that takes determination.

So basically, chances are that relativley soon we'll get to see the Emo Rangers fight again, or at least you can feel like that until it turns out to be the aforementioned hoax. Yay. Though to be honest, it's kind of irritating. After all this time we could finally be getting our hands on the Emo Rangers. That's all well and good, but it's only six episodes, and chances are they're all going to be under five minutes. Yes, the effects will probably be better, but this is something I'd enjoy from DeviantArt as opposed to an independent film maker. Once they're gone, what then? Chances are that after that fiasco they won't want to try it all again. My personal suggestion? Why not do a competition to find a new group of Emo Rangers to enter Zeo or something? It'd probably be expensive as shit, but still that'd be a Hell Yeah.

This is ThatKidWithTheSideburns, Sideburning off.

Freddy vs. Jason

What's the coolest thing you can think of? Probably the Adventures of Dr. McNinja, cos that's basically 'Crazy Awesome: The Comic,' but what's one thing you know that you're gonna have to see? How about, your favorite character fighting your OTHER favorite character? Yes, I'd pay for that. And hundreds of thousands of people have, particulerly in the world of comics where anything mainstream is likley to have a crosover every second issue. But what is probably better is the odd crossover film. Chances are it will be between two similar characters. For example, Alien vs. Predator, King Kong vs, Godzilla, heck Godzilla's could have a whole series of films based on the ones where he fought monsters originating in other movies.

The main problem with making a crossover is that mainly its just massive non-sexual (mostly) fanservice, and people tend to forget that they're still making a movie and should try to make it good. The most shining example of this failing that I can imagine is Alien vs. Predator Requiem. I liked Alien vs. Predator, but the sequel basically rode on using the PredAlien, and threw togethor some mindless carnage and shot like five minutes of footage that was supposed to resemble a plot. Plus they crossed both the child killing taboo, and the pregnant woman killing taboo. Basically I guess what I'm saying is, Alien vs. Predator Requiem, YOU SUCK! But that's another story altogethor.

However, there is one fight that people had been waiting for a while. I of course speak of, Freddy vs. Jason.


I'm a Freddy man myself, mainly because I just tend to find his concept more scary than Jason. Jason is your essential slasher villain, he'll chase you up the stairs and pick off your friends, and basically make you want to get as far away as possible so that you can rest. Freddy gets you WHEN your resting, and thus dosn't need to chase you up the stairs.

After his defeat in Freddy's Dead (which I haven't seen) Freddy is in hell and cannot enter the Dream World because his home town Springwood has gone to great lengths to make everyone forget about him. Without any memory of him, they can't fear him, and without fear he is powerless. So, he finds someone who will make them remember, a fellow supernatural killer named Jason Voorhees. Proving tha Jason is just a big ol' mummas boy, he diguises himself as Pamela Voorhees and aks him to go to Elm Street and start spreading some carnage so that they think Freddy's back, and he does.

Lori Campbell is the newest resident of Krueger's old house, meaning that Jason's first stop is there (seriously, if they're willing to ignore their childrens pleas for help to forget Freddy, why don't they knock down the damn house?). After picks off some of her acquaintences and starts haunting her and her friends dreams, she realises she's in danger and needs help. However, things are worse than they seem. Once Freddy's back, he's not too happy to find out that Jason's still going. But he just crosses the line when he takes Freddy's first kill away from him.

The first thing I want to talk about in this film is that it starts with a prologue. Whenever a film starts with an epic prologue, chances are things are going to go downhill from there. The best aversions of this would be Star Wars and Lord of the Rings. Fortunatley it's not over the top with CGI and is pretty well narrated by Freddy.

Second of all, it DOSN'T suck! Oh my god that is awesome! Okay, I have actually seen the film some years ago, but only rewatched it recently. The film isn't anything special, but it is pretty good, all things considered.

One problem with the film is that it feels more like an Elm Street film more than a Friday film. But then I thought to myself, how could it feel any more like a Friday film? Freddy pretty much has his own mythos, there's plans to keep him down, there;s drugs to repress him, he has numerous enemies (most of them dead) he has a fairly interesting origin, has his abilities, his boiler room, and the house. Jason has his weapons, his abilities, his mother, Camp Crystal Lake, that eerie chi chi chi chi sound and well, the series is just too inconsistant to inclue stuff like his cyborg upgrades in Jason X. I guess the only way to make him seem less like a Guest Star would be to have a guy whose familiar with him as a main character. I guess the film sort of balances this would pretty well by having him pummel Freddy pretty brutally a few times.

Now with the story away from the killers, I am genuinley shocked to find that I remember the characters and actually felt bad when they died. I know, I know, shocking right? They're a little flat in a few respects, but you'll remember who they are (even if you don't catch their name the first time around). I paticulerly like Gibb, Lori's alchoholic friend (Yes, Gibb i the name of a girl) even if it's just cps she looks cool in that cap she's never seen without. The mal characters are much more boring, though I've got to give the dorky one points for trying to attack Jason to defend the others. Good job.

One other thing I noticed is that Freddy dosn't really get to go all out with his usual set of horrific deaths (though we get reminded of them in the prologue). This guy can walk you around the roon like a puppet with your veins, and in this film he pretty much sticks with slashing. He does get to do some creepy stuff like turning into a giant Bong smoking maggot and forcing himself down some dudes throat, but most of the deaths are done by blade. The gruesomeness is sort of lampshaded by Jason, however, when he takes his first kill in Springwood. He stabs the guy a bunch of times, and then folds him into his own bed. I can imagine the dream behind that being kind of messed up.

Also, there is the minor gripe of the fighting. All the fights are pretty cool, but there aren't very many of them. I guess that's not a big problem because they're both being pretty psycho throughout their scenes, so both sets of fans will get what they want. I especially like the party scene where Jason gets teased by these two drunk guys for coming in a costume. He twists one guys head around, then gets set on fire, then kills the other dude with his machete at long range. Then it's just funny to see peple charge at him and gt slaughtered in mass.
However, the final fight brings Freddy into the real world, which takes away his reality warping powers, and reduces him to incredible strength and immunity. Needless to say, he gets owned a fair bit. There's a particulerly odd moment where he falls off some construction workand gets his leg caught in a giant whacky pendulam thing. On a whole, however, I'd say the fights are pretty good, and sadly probably better than the 'Epic Climax' of Iron Man 2.

Also, there are a few Crowning Moments of Awesome and Funny. Lori gets a CMoA for actually going into her dream to get Freddy, and also for doing no less than BLOWING HIM AND JASON UP! She just punched out Cthulhu. Jason gets a few by get electrocuted with a few thousnad volts and using it to his advantage, mimmicing Freddy's style of gruesome murder (as stated above) and actually seeming like a Hero in comparison to Freddy, who talks and therefore is able to be much more of a dick even if e gets like under ten kills throughout the film.
I can't really say there's a lot of CMoA's for Freddy aside from remaining a pun spewing jokester and genuinley seeming threatening for the first time in a while, but he gets a CMoF for using Jason's body to play Pinball. Lori's friend Kia gets one when she needs to give Jason Mouth-to-Mouth. And I suppose seeing the Freddy Grub smoke his bong was pretty funny. I mighy also mention the scene where Freddy tries to take his first kill and fails got a laugh out of me. Especially with the Big Lipped Alligator Moment that is the goat. That and he wakes up and gets killed by Jason.
I'd like to mention the scene where Gibb dies as being funny, but that's only because the glowstick guy gets killed and because of Freddy's reaction. The rape part of the moment makes it less funny though, or more considering that the dudes dead now.

On a whole, I'd say that unless your looking to make a film that is going to be reveered like the source material, aim for the qaulity of Freddy vs. Jason if you're making a crossover film. Speaking of which, I sure hope the Avenger dosn't suck, but I'll make a bigger point of that later on.

And finally, no I haven't read Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash or it's sequel, but I might in the future.

Awesome Covers: Savage Dragon 34

This is probably the first Awesome Covers that showcases a comic I don't actually own. Mainly because I haven't done one in a while, and secondly because I haven't really been talking about actual comics for a while. I think it's clear that I won't be doing reviews on a regular basis, that's for sure.

Anyway, what I liked about this cover. I probably wouldn't car that much in other circumstances, but just look, it's Savage Dragon, one of my favorite comic book characters (RIP Savage Dragon) fighting Hellboy, who has been the star of one of my favorite movies, and just for good measure they have BrainiApe in the background. So essentially, this is a Police Officer Finned Alien fighting a Kitten Loving Badass Hero Demon with Hitler's Brain implantd into a Gorilla in the background. DAYUMN!