Awesome Covers: Guarding the Globe #2

A monstrous and menacing octopus monster recieves a continual series of I AM A MAN punches from an entire team of superheroes. What's not to love?

In any other case, this cover looks great. All the heroes diving after Octoboss looks badass, and it's drawn brilliantly. This is the sort of thing that will make me pic up a comic book.

The Guarding the Globe miniseries is a spin-off from Invincible. Since the titular hero has recently left Earth to fight the Viltrumite Empire, the guys working behind the famous team Guardians of the Globe decide they need to start recruiting and expand the team into a Global operation (it ironically has focussed on America the past few years).

The series is cool, with Kirkman's trademark awesomeness and great artwork. I have to give him a hand, an Invincible film or cartoon is well deserved.

Though of course the series would be oddly violent for a superhero cartoon. Even though the Invincible series is mostly light hearted, the violence is pretty strong.

Big Daddy vs. Bid Daddy.

Reasons why Kick-Ass's Batman cosplayer, AKA Damien Macready is a hundred times more badass than BioShock's homicidal Scuba Divers?

1) Unlike Rapture's contender's Damien dosn't need to protect his little girl. Under his influence, she can take care of herself.

2) Damien dresses like Batman, and Batman could beat up anything.

3) In Rapture, Big Daddy's are clunky and slow, meaning you will have time to run away. In New York, Big Daddy will snack your neck before you even figured out he was there.

4) You can't wear Damien Macready.

5) In Rapture, Big Daddy is not played by Nicholas Cage.

6) Damien Macready is also Ghost Rider.

7) If Damien Macready had Plasmids, he could kill Rapture. Not destroy, not kill everyone inside, he could KILL THE CITY.

8) If you kill a Big Daddy in Rapture, it's little girl is up for the taking. If you kill Damien Macready, his little girl will kill you and everyone involved.

One Moment in Time: My Thoughts.

I've already been on a tangent in regards to Quesada, so I'll focus on the actual book this time (and by extension, Quesada).

One Moment in Time is an unusual thing. You know how you may play a video game, when suddenly it glitches, causing something that shouldn't happen or exist, like getting stuck in a wall or an enemy turning inside out? Imagine four issues of a comic book like that.

Reading it, I didn't actually have a problem with what I was reading that much. However, there was not one second that I was unaware of what this abomination was.

One aspect of the comic is that the writers 'cleverly' mixed in pages from the issues from the actual Spider-Man wedding issues. This is actually a clever idea, but then it just becomes depressing when you realise that this moment in comic book history is being twisted into the incorrect and warped stage we have now. That seems downright antagonistic towards the fans! It's like "Here's that Teddy Bear you loved when you were little. Now here's a pipe bomb. Guess what happens next!"

Mary Jane comes across as subtley antagonistic considering that she's the one to break off the relationship after Peter goes missing on the wedding night. That's understandable, but Quesada's intention is clearly to paint the image that she's the bad guy and we should stop wanting her and Peter to get back togethor. Well sorry Joe, this is one Mary Jane fan you can't just buff off.

There's also some intense irony in that the story is displayed as a series of flashbacks between Mary Jane and Peter. Almost the whole time Peter is requesting that they stop, but MJ keeps saying that it'll clear things up. There is no way this wasn't intentional.

Of course the absolute worst thing about this story is that Mr. Q actually thought it would be a good idea to continue the infamous One More Day storyline (Considering how much it flopped, it's just mind boggling), but it is seconded by the fact that it could have easily been a mere two issues, but he somehow in his head felt that we needed twice that!

The second issue's flashback ends with Peter and Mary Jane deciding that they won't get married, but they will go out. Really. I have a lot of trouble believing that it was necessary to use up four issues to say 'It was exactly the same except there was no marriage.' But what really grates me is how they handle erasing Spider-Man's secret identity. Here's my opinion: You didn't need to.

Mephisto changed history, you could have easily said that by doing that, he never chose to reveal his identity and avoid this whole thing. But no, you wanted us to read four issues of your crap!

Okay, but I will admit there were some okay things involved. They do not help the comic in any way, but I honestly don't think anything could.

1 Quesada has proven that even though he has the brain of a single celled organism (A dumb on) his art is surprisingly bearable. I say bearable and not good because in a few panels you'll notice him getting sloppy.

2 Issue 3 has a funny moment where Peter uses his secret identity to get a nurse to keep an eye on Aunt May.

3 Issue has one of the awesomest letters column I have ever seen in the series, if only it suggests that Stan Lee viciously attacked the editor and took over. That was hilarious.

4 Every issue had a part of Stan Lee's two page spread Amazing Spider-Man issue. Having read a few issues of Stan Lee's run, I can say that the artwork really helps evoke that feeling, so if you were a fan of that era, you might want to check this out. My favorite thing about the series are the two main antagonists, a mad genius named Brain, and his stupid henchmen named Bull. They aren't very interesting characters, but they instantly become hilarious if you start reading their dialogue with Pinky and the Brain in mind.

So, just to recap, Quesada should get a new job, Spider-Man is a good character, and I like Stan Lee...ONE MOMENT IN TIME SUCKS! 1/10 stars!

Top 15 Doctor Who Quotes.

As my two fans may know, I am an avid Dr. Who fan. Both new series and old, and almost every Doctor, I love the series. A combination of entertaining acting, clever (If cheap) special effects, and excellent writing made the show legendaary for thousands of people all over the world. Something great that came from the writing was also a great number of memorable quites, so here's my top favorite ones.

-15 "Ooh, that’ll never work out. He’s gay and she’s an alien" -The Ninth Doctor examining a celebrity marriage.

-14 "Nothing, said the Ice -Berg to the Titanic. Bloop, bloop"-The Fourth Doctor explaining why he dosn't like the word 'Unsinkable.'

-13 "I just gave away ten years of my life, worth every second"-The Doctor after blowing on a lightbulb.


-12 "Reverse the Polarity of the Neutron Flow."- The most famous line spoken by the Third Doctor.

-11 "Doctor who?"-Numerous.

-10 "Television! In the Stomach! Now that’s evolution"-The Master, most evil man in the universe, watching Teletubbies.

-9 "Hey, you’ve got a shop, I like a little shop."-The Doctor during an alien attack on a hospital.

-8 "THIS IS NOT WAR! THIS IS PEST CONTROL!"-A Dalek talking to a Cyberman.

-7 "EXTERMINATE!"-Every Dalek ever.

-6 "The image of an Angel IS an Angel..."-The last thing you'll remember before passing out from fear.

-5 "Let me guess, my theories outrage you, my hyraces anger you, I don’t answer letters, and you don’t like the look of my tie."-The Seventh Doctor replying to an angry reverand.

-4 "If you Daleks are supposed to be the superior race of the universe, why don’t you try climbing after me?" -The Fourth Doctor making fun of a Dalek.

-3 "This time, everybody lives."-The Ninth Doctor after saving the world from a zombie plague without anyone dying.

-2 "It’s like a great big ball of wibbly wobbly, timey whimey stuff."-The Doctor explaining the power of the Weeping Angels.

-1 "What do Monsters have nightmares about? ‘Me’" The Doctor telling a little girl the absolute truth.

Epic Fail!

My friend Jan walked into a TV. Somehow he just walked into it. He had plenty of room to avoid it, but he just walked too close to it and hit his head. In hindsight, he Epic Fails a lot.

Mental Covers: Joining The Team.

As evil begins to strike in stronger force, Mental is forced to join the only superhero team around, The Team!

This is just a basic idea back from what I know as the Second Stage of Mental. Back then there was a team called The Team (appropriately enough). They were comprised of 'Soda Mutants,' people who had been mutated thanks to a special chemical added into soda by Captain Mental's arch enemy, Dr. Mask (Nowadays, Mental dosn't really have an arch enemy). They formed a team, and after a while of serving as allies, Mental finally became a member.

The Team was comprised of...

Sparkplug: Teenager who can turn his body into a bolt of lightning.

Soundwave: Egotistical teenager who can change the sound of his voice.

Dr. Stone: Skilled surgeon mutated into a large rock monster.

Stabenslash: School teacher with Wolverine style abilities.

Spiderette: Sarcastic and angry girl who has spider powers.

Mystic: Psychic sarcastic, dry and droll teenager mutated into a floating blob.

Miya the Ogress: Unofficial member. A large green girl with enormous eating habits.

Villain Spotlight: Cobra Commander.

The leader of the ruthless terrorist organisation known as Cobra. Cobra Commander is known for disguisng his deformed appearance behind a hood or metal faceplate, and spouting his commands through his shrill, high pitched voice. His position of power showcases his quite possible insanity, tosssing around billions of dollars to draw a picture of his face on the moon at one stage even!

Cobra Command has been at odds with GI JOE for decades now, and throughout them little has been discovered about him, and even what we do know varies from adaptation to adaptation. Is he secretly a reptillian humanoid sent by a secret race of snake people? Is he a used car salesman gone mad? Or is he the brother of the Baroness, driven mad with betrayal (No, he isn't )?

Whatever the origin, Cobra Commander will stop at nothing until he is the supreme overlord of Earth, and has the Joes destroyed.

In a side note, he seems very similar to Coyle Commander

But the difference is that Coyle Commander is real and trying to recruit people into his army via Facebook (Here, in facthttp://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=152900714729615 ), and Cobra Commander is a fictional character (Cooler, though ).

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